Past good byes that have been endured can be rated from 'don't care' to 'disasterous'.
Saying good bye to my Dad in Manly hospital. His last words to me were 'don't go, I don't want you to go'. He hadn't spoken a word in two weeks and that is what he left me with. My last words to him were 'I have to but I'll be back this afternoon. I love you'. I am crying as I write this because we really are/were a close family and I feel the gap so very much.
Saying good bye to England when I was nearly 17 was only slightly less devastating. Even though I have lived in Australia more than half my life I still consider myself more POME than Ozzie (except for when the cricket or rugby is on and then I become 'fickle'.) Charlotte & I hugged ever so tightly as we said our farewells. We were as desparate as any 'teenage-school-girls-best-friends-from-birth' could be. We would never see each other again in quite the same way.
Saying good bye to anyone for any length of time can be difficult for me. This is why I will usually disappear quietly from a party or a weekend away without actually saying it. One doesn't always say good bye to people though.
Saying good bye to my waistline had it's upside as at it meant hello to 3 beautiful, shiny, new and chaotic kids! Life has never been the same since they appeared. They are completely brilliant individuals and I am blessed to have them in my life.
Saying good bye to my Grandmothers chipped tea cup was both difficult and extremely liberating. In fact it was the start of realising that I didn't need to keep everything that someone once owned to show how much I loved them. The piles of stuff kept did not equate to the amount of grief I felt about them no longer being here. Learning this started a whole series of events that allowed me to stop hoarding and come to the end of my grieving. It sounds simple I know but over a matter of time I no longer worried about the piles of stuff as well as the grief. It all just kind of, well, subsided.
Saying good bye has given me so many opportunities to appreciate life. No longer could Dad be sought for advice or opinion so I had to go out and learn. Leaving England also meant leaving my youth and I arrived in Australia as an 'adult'. People had no experience of who I was at school and so I had a fresh start. No longer a 'clown' in the back row, I could be reborn.
Saying 'hello' to the kids helped me to shelve my ego and put others first. Those 3 have had me overwhelmed with joy and despair within a heartbeat of each other so I have had to learn to think first and respond second, at times without any discernable delay!
When we say good bye to one thing we are always saying hello to something else. When I am hired by someone who has trouble letting go of 'stuff' the question is always the same. "What are you making room for?" The answers have been as delightfully varied as my wonderful clients are:
- "To live again"
- "Opportunities"
- "A sewing room"
- "A partner"
- "New clothes"
So dear reader, what would you like to say good bye to?
